Half The Strength

Half The Strength

No one ever talks about how mentally difficult it is when you find yourself back in the gym and only having half the strength you used to.

It’s a serious struggle. In an instant you can find yourself feeling dumb, embarrassed, weak, angry, frustrated.

“How did I let this happen?”

It can be paralyzing if you let it. And honestly, several times lately I have let that voice win. And due to that, I started feeling worse. Continue reading “Half The Strength”

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Down 11 Pounds

Down 11 Pounds

First picture, I’m standing at 128 lbs and feeling excellent. I hadn’t been lifting consistency but my nutrition was pretty solid.

Second picture, I’m down 11 lbs… Most of which was probably muscle but that’s just an assumption.

This loss was not on purpose. Not even a little bit! It followed a month long battle with a cold, then influenza mixed with a bunch a stress that ended me up in a pretty ugly bout with my hypoglycemia. I haven’t had an episode that bad in over a year. It took days to recover. I could barely move, let alone stand. It took everything I had to drink water or 3 bites of oatmeal. It was terrible.

I felt lifeless. I was scared. I remember waking up my boyfriend telling him it was worse than I thought and I was scared to go to the hospital. We decided I’d get strict and try to fight it, even if that meant him reminding me to drink pedialyte every hour because it was the last thing I wanted to do.

Do you know what being in that kind of physical state does to your mental state? It makes you think you’re the worst person in the world. It convinces you that you’re a burden on those who love you. It convinces you that it’s all your fault and if you weren’t such a terrible person then you wouldn’t have let your body get to this state in the first place. It makes you feel ashamed for something you truly can’t control. you find yourself apologizing for asking for help even though you really need it. Continue reading “Down 11 Pounds”

Real Change

Real Change

7 years ago I posted the picture on the left as my “goal” physique. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to have curves. I wanted to look that way AND feel healthy.

I had zero idea how to get there.

I would try the regularly suggested methods of eating and all the “fad” ways to get the booty and abs… guess what? None of that worked. And I would go through cycles of consistency, not feel better, not get stronger, and in turn would get discouraged and then give up. Continue reading “Real Change”

PROJECT MANAGING YOUR HEALTH

PROJECT MANAGING YOUR HEALTH

I’m not sure if it’s because we’ve recently had several serious scares with my mom’s health or if I’m attracting more of these kinds of conversations but lately I’ve noticed something among so many people I’ve encountered and it’s quite honestly pissing me off.

Here’s why; Your health isn’t something to fuck around with.

You only get one body. That’s it. There’s no redo. There’s no turning it in for a new model. And while yes, this country especially has been feeding the masses full of false information about health for decades, it’s the age of information and you have all the data you need to turn your health around at your fingertips.

Yes, doctors can be involved, and they can guide you, BUT YOU HAVE CONTROL AS WELL. You have control over the most important parts. Continue reading “PROJECT MANAGING YOUR HEALTH”

What If You Just Did It Anyway?

What If You Just Did It Anyway?

So many people ask me how I get motivated to write, or go to the gym, or do my work even though I really don’t have anyone to answer to but myself.

And the answer is, I’m not always motivated.

I don’t always want to.

It’s not always convenient or exciting.

But I do it anyway.

Honestly, I don’t even allow myself another option anymore. Continue reading “What If You Just Did It Anyway?”

The Gym

The Gym

I remember a time when going to the gym was the last thing I ever wanted to do. When cancelling a training session was always an option when my day was going bad or I wasn’t feeling well.

Oh how things have changed…

Now, the worse the day, the worse I feel, the more I want to be in the gym. The more I want to put my headphones on, stare myself in the face, and prove to myself how strong I really am.

Today I feel like a zombie.
Pouring myself into my clients for over 16 hours this weekend drained me (and lit me up, but energy hangover like whoa).
Continue reading “The Gym”

What’s The Deal With That Chick You Train?

What’s The Deal With That Chick You Train?

Apparently there’s this strange situation in my gym where I’ve become the “mystery girl” and people keep cornering my trainer when I’m not there and questioning him about me. Seriously, I can’t make this shit up.

Now if you met Brent (my personal trainer) you’d understand that he’s super straight forward, means business, determined, and focused dude. Doesn’t talk shit. Always takes action. No nonsense kind of guy. So when various guys in the gym started coming up to him while he was working out alone and asking about me, his responses were hilarious. Continue reading “What’s The Deal With That Chick You Train?”