Leave It There

Leave It There

Leave it there.
Those pieces that are breaking off.
Those things that are no longer serving you.

Maybe it’s a belief. Maybe it’s a habit. Maybe it’s a story. Maybe it’s a person. Maybe it’s a place. Maybe it’s a pattern. Maybe it’s as small as choosing silence over a response. Continue reading “Leave It There”

Advertisements

The Decision

The Decision

The decision. The one made with no clue how it will actually come to life, no idea how it’s going to be delivered, or when and still, you decide.

Just the belief that it will be.

The utter certainty that it will, in fact be your reality.

Actually, it already is.

Inside your mind, that thing you’ve decided on, that choice you’ve made, it’s already yours. Continue reading “The Decision”

I am Happy

I am happy.

In a totally different way than ever before.

For very different reasons.

In some of the same beautiful ways but more so, in brand new, exciting, mindshattering ways.

And apparently THIS (pictured below) is the face of that happiness. It’s what expression I have instantly made in every photo for quite a while now. When I try to smile with my teeth, which is the norm for me and it looks forced and weird and inauthentic right now. I’m not sure how to explain it but that is obviously not the expression of the type of happiness I’m experiencing right now and I am totally okay with that!

This expression is one of exploration. It is one of adventure. It is one of learning. It is one of deeply experiencing something fucking beautiful with zero idea of how to really put said experiences into words just yet.

This expression is perfect for this phase 

Falling In Love and Being In Love

Falling In Love and Being In Love

There is a difference between falling in love and BEING in love.

Falling in love is easy. People do it all the time. Sure, it can be scary sometimes but it’s not a hard thing to do.

But being in love is a totally different animal. I don’t mean the difference between having loving feelings for someone and “being in love”. I’m talking about the day in day out activity of being IN love. Choosing it consciously every day. Working at it. Talking about what you like and don’t like. Listening. Forgiving. Understanding. Standing still. Going crazy. Climbing high. Diving deep. Building empires. Taking down walls. Supporting. Encouraging. Compassion. Honestly. Continue reading “Falling In Love and Being In Love”

Let’s Talk About Pooping…

Let’s Talk About Pooping…

Okay, let’s talk about pooping.

Yep, you read that right but it’s not what you think. I’m not going to talk to you about how your diet effects your bowel movements or try to tell you about the latest cleanse. What I’m wanting to talk about is the amount of time people spend in the bathroom “pooping” or most likely just sitting there on your phone hiding away from the world and killing some time.

Here’s the thing… If it legit takes you 45 minutes to take a shit every single day then you probably DO need to see a doctor or adjust your diet because that is not healthy. But if you’re sitting there fucking around on your phone or daydreaming or just wasting time, then only you can be honest with yourself about that. The whole “act” of doing your business in there probably takes 5-10 minutes tops. The sitting and dragging it out into a marathon is simply a choice.

Now maybe it’s a conscious choice. Maybe it’s the place where you choose to get some quiet time away from the loudness of your life (or kids). Maybe it’s where you get caught up responding to comments on social media. Maybe it’s where you take a little time to read that blog you subscribe to without being interrupted. All of those things are a CHOICE. And if that is an intentional part of your day, then more power to ya my friend. Do you, just wash your hands and your phone when you’re done.

But here’s my point here… how many of you are actually being conscious with of ALL of your time? Continue reading “Let’s Talk About Pooping…”

Down 11 Pounds

Down 11 Pounds

First picture, I’m standing at 128 lbs and feeling excellent. I hadn’t been lifting consistency but my nutrition was pretty solid.

Second picture, I’m down 11 lbs… Most of which was probably muscle but that’s just an assumption.

This loss was not on purpose. Not even a little bit! It followed a month long battle with a cold, then influenza mixed with a bunch a stress that ended me up in a pretty ugly bout with my hypoglycemia. I haven’t had an episode that bad in over a year. It took days to recover. I could barely move, let alone stand. It took everything I had to drink water or 3 bites of oatmeal. It was terrible.

I felt lifeless. I was scared. I remember waking up my boyfriend telling him it was worse than I thought and I was scared to go to the hospital. We decided I’d get strict and try to fight it, even if that meant him reminding me to drink pedialyte every hour because it was the last thing I wanted to do.

Do you know what being in that kind of physical state does to your mental state? It makes you think you’re the worst person in the world. It convinces you that you’re a burden on those who love you. It convinces you that it’s all your fault and if you weren’t such a terrible person then you wouldn’t have let your body get to this state in the first place. It makes you feel ashamed for something you truly can’t control. you find yourself apologizing for asking for help even though you really need it. Continue reading “Down 11 Pounds”

I Choose You

I Choose You

“I choose you”. A friend and I were having a conversation today and this came up and it instantly became so apparent to me that people do not put enough emphasis on that statement.

Sure we love each other and that’s great and it can be powerful but what about the fact that you CHOOSE that person?

I don’t know about you, but to me that almost holds more precedence than saying I love you. In romantic relationships I don’t think you can have the commitment of “I choose you” without the foundation of “I love you” but I do believe that you can have the “ I love you” without the choosing. Continue reading “I Choose You”