Choose Joy

Choose Joy

Ya know what’s fun?

Being happy.
Choosing joy.
Even when darkness creeps in, choosing not to let it stay. Honoring it, looking at it, but letting it go and doing whatever it takes to choose happy again.

Happiness truly is a choice. One you get to make every morning and then a thousand more times all day, every day. Continue reading “Choose Joy”

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Battling Depression

Battling Depression

*Originally posted September 30th, 2019

My beautiful friend Samantha called me yesterday morning while I was in the middle of a battle with my depression, I wanted to crawl back into bed and hide from the world. I was talking myself through every step.

I ate breakfast and took care of Bonnie. Win.

I showered. Win.

Sat there for like 20 minutes in a towel contemplating getting back under the covers.

Got up and dried my hair instead. Win.

Then I started pacing… I was so mad that I was in this fog. Annoyed to have to deal with it.
Feeling defeated at the thought of having to pull myself out of it… AGAIN. Debating going backwards on some relationship behaviors I’ve been working months to overcome because, well it felt like a quick fix.

Then Samantha called.

I had called her a few hours ago as I felt this all weighing down on me and left a message “it’s heavy today, call me when you can”.

A message that was hard to send but I’ve learned to reach out when I’m drowning. I don’t always listen to that advice but today I did.
Luckily had yet to put my makeup on because I answered the phone feeling okay but the moment she asked what was going on? Queue tears. Continue reading “Battling Depression”

Lean In

Lean In

Don’t understand something? Lean in.
Disapprove of someone’s position? Lean in.
Feel defensive? Lean in.
Don’t agree with someone? Lean in.

We have got to quit creating wide opinions on things we’ve not even taking the time to become educated on simply because it’s being delivered by an individual or group that you “disagree” with.

Lean in.
Ask questions.
Do your research. Continue reading “Lean In”

What We Should Focus On

What We Should Focus On

“Forget her looks. How about her insane work ethic? Her unstoppable ambition? And her ridiculously dope soul?” Ladies, having a pretty face is just a bonus. Having a body that you feel good about helps and being healthy should be a priority.

But having an honest heart? An open mind? A passionate essence? And a beautifully deep soul?

Those are the things you should be most focused on. They’re a bigger part of the foundation than anything else can you could possibly build.

Want to attract the right people? The ones your soul chooses for you? Start you journey inward. Get quiet and listen to yourself everyday. Start there.

Because what better compliment is there than to be loved for your brain? Or your drive? Or how bright your soul shines?

Jeepiversary

Jeepiversary

*Originally posted September 21st, 2019

6 years ago I walked into the dealership and did whatever it took to get this Jeep.

I grew up in a car family. It was a joke on our street about how it seemed like one of us was outside washing a vehicle every day. My Dad takes extremely pristine care of his vehicles and instilled that onto me and my brother. But the other thing he taught us by example was to LOVE what you drive.

Six years ago I was driving a brand new Dodge Avenger. It was a nice car. Sporty, good gas mileage, all the bells and whistles but I didn’t “love” it. Truth is, I missed bouncing around town with some over-sized tires and that was actually FUN to drive. Continue reading “Jeepiversary”

Solid Foundation

Solid Foundation
This is why you create a solid foundation.
At least it’s a visual reminder as to why.You create a solid foundation so that when life happens and you fall off the track for a bit, everything doesn’t go to shit.

Real talk, my life took a super unexpected and interesting turn over the past 9 months… or year really. I started diving in, DEEP. Unearthing things that I had buried and didn’t acknowledge for years. I cleared so many things mentally and physically it’s almost impossible to even explain. And then I fell in love, listened to a message bigger than me and uprooted my life, moved 600 miles away, created a life there, learned, grew, tried my best, played out some karmic soul contract related shit, learned so many lessons about who I am and how fucking strong I actually am as a human, moved back, and have been hard at work rebuilding every thing I ever knew. Every social contract. Every obligation. Every deeply rooted behavior. Every automatic response. Every way of processing emotions. Every way of existing.
I have spent the past 6 months learning new and healthier ways to navigate every single area of my world. Continue reading “Solid Foundation”

Support System

Support System

The other day I was sitting in the salon chair recapping some current events from my world with my friend and hair stylist when I realized that I had just referenced my therapist and my psychiatrist within a few short breaths of each other. When realizing that, I stopped and jokingly said “Damn, don’t I sound like a mess? It takes a team to keep my head right!” To which she replied “Nope! Sounds smart to me. It’s your job to keep a whole list full of people’s heads and business’s right, only makes sense that you have your own team for yours.”

That comment has been ringing in my head ever since. First off, she was right. And she knows me pretty damn well. We’ve been friends since high school but over the past 4 years she’s been the brains behind this mermaid hair which means she gets the joy of spending 4+ hours with me every few months to install a new set of extensions… so it’s safe to say, she knows all of the things. I’m not sure I’ve ever met someone more understanding or less judgmental in my life and I’m super grateful for that relationship.

Back to my point, I have assembled quite the team of professionals to keep me sane and functioning at a high capacity. Sure, I’m the one spending the money, dedicating the time, and doing the work, but they are there to help me navigate everything in the healthiest way possible. Continue reading “Support System”