Real talk: I’m nauseous constantly.

I wake up nauseous and have to literally talk myself out of puking every morning. Thank God I’m as mentally strong as I am. Until about a year ago I DID actually puke every morning because I woke up with my blood sugar so out of wack. I have made major improvements in my quality of life over the past couple of years by systems of trial and error and figuring out what makes me feel the best.
Continue reading “Nauseous”


My Fitness Journey

My Fitness Journey

My 2018 starting point is a body I barely recognize most of the time. Something I never thought was possible for me.

Figuring what makes my body run at peak performance and allows me to FEEL good has been such an interesting discovery ride.

This past year I have discovered which foods maintain a stable blood sugar for me, I started eating a high fat macro based diet, fell in love with building my shoulders, back, and arms, and now squat 175lbs on a regular basis.

I’ve added over 2 inches of size on my thighs and glutes, and over 1 inch on my biceps. I’ve gained 8 lbs in muscle and am down to 19% body fat. Solid fucking growth for someone who always struggled to maintain 118 lbs for most of her life, if you ask me.

But have I been 100% on my diet and workouts? Nope.

I’d say I was about 75% on my diet and 90% on my training. Looking back at the past 365 days and seeing the progress I’ve made and the strength and mass I’ve created I can’t help but ask myself, “where would I be if I stayed 100% disciplined?” Well, we’re going to find out.

I’m not going to drop my goals here in a “new year” post for you, you’ll see my results as I keep putting in the work and turn up the heat on it all.

Stay tuned. It’s just getting better from here.

I also wanted to note that I share much more of my fitness journey over on my Instagram so follow me there if you want to see more regular updates.

P.s. My fitness journey started two years ago. I’ve been diligent about figuring out what works for me in diet and training for two years. That is 730 days of choosing every day to focus on this mission. Thats 730 of choosing this lifestyle. So before you say “oh, I couldn’t look like that” ask yourself how many days you’ve been consistently committed to it?

You CAN build the change, you just have to do the work every day.

Healthy Weight

Healthy Weight

Yesterday I weighed in at 130.8 and screamed with excitement.

You see, 2 years ago I started this journey to healthy and 130 was my ideal “healthy weight” but I wanted to build it on.

Not like I really had any choice in the matter. I always hovered around 117-119 my entire adult life. I could eat more than a grown man and not gain an ounce. Continue reading “Healthy Weight”

My Fitness Journey

My Fitness Journey

I will never forget this moment… as silly as it sounds, I gave this pic a double take after I took it and remember thinking to myself “whose body is that?!” I was so fucking proud. I’d worn that dress so many times, it is one of my “go tos” but it didn’t used to fit like that.

It had been a few months since the last time I had pulled it out of the closet and it was a pleasant surprise to see the how it showcased the changes in my body I had been working so hard to build.
Continue reading “My Fitness Journey”

Always Sick…

Always Sick…

“Skinny fat”… it’s a thing. It’s a thing no one thinks is a problem… and for some, maybe it’s not…but for me it was a BIG problem.

I was always sick.
I had no energy.
I had zero strength.
I could eat more than most grown men I knew but never gained a pound.

I remember seeing the picture on the left right after it was taken and being embarrassed (see bottom of post). That “skinny minnie” look everyone always said they were so jealous of was NOT how I wanted to look. Not even a little bit… but I didn’t know anything else was possible.

After many years of rapidly losing weight, never feeling good, more doctors appointments than I can count, passing out several times in public because my body shut down, and more hospital stays than I cared to have in a lifetime, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Continue reading “Always Sick…”

Keeping the Balance

Keeping the Balance

I struggle with keeping the balance. I know it’s possible because I DO create it. I know that I operate better when I’m in a place of balance but the truth is, I must work hard at it.

You see, my instinct is to work my fingers to the bone until I can’t stand any more.

That’s what I’ve always known. I come from a world of hard working, blue collar badasses who work from sun up to sun down and don’t ever complain once because they do what they gotta do.
Continue reading “Keeping the Balance”

Multiple choice

Multiple choice

“The 10 commandments aren’t multiple choice”.

I was driving down the street a couple days ago and saw that written on a sign in front of a church.

I immediately thought, “That goes the same for Core 4”.

It’s not a multiple choice question.

You don’t get to just pick one and only focus on it and think that life is going to be peachy.

You don’t get to master one and then move to the next, no longer working on the first one and think that everything is going to still flow.

That’s not how it works.

They all fit together.

They all feed off each other. Continue reading “Multiple choice”