Me Too

Me Too

I had on a new skirt, my hair was on point, and I felt great as I entered the arena on the arm of my then longtime boyfriend, Tony. We were there to support a local charity, to socialize with a ton of our friends and business associates, and to watch some police officers and firefighters duke it out in the ring. It was bound to be a great night!

As we made our way through the maze of tables on the floor surrounding the ring, we stopped at many of them to give hugs, shake hands, take pictures and say hello. Everyone was pleasant, and everyone always loved Tony and me. We got many compliments on the energy we brought into a conversation. Continue reading “Me Too”

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Fuck Standing Still

Fuck Standing Still

I’m going to be 30 in a few days. 30 years old, it’s hard to believe. It feels like these past 10 years have flown by. To be honest with you, I’ve always felt older. I’ve always been one of the youngest people in every room most of my adult life. So NO, I’m not freaking out about hitting the big 3-0 like a lot of people keep asking. I’m actually excited.
Continue reading “Fuck Standing Still”

Always Sick…

Always Sick…

“Skinny fat”… it’s a thing. It’s a thing no one thinks is a problem… and for some, maybe it’s not…but for me it was a BIG problem.

I was always sick.
I had no energy.
I had zero strength.
I could eat more than most grown men I knew but never gained a pound.

I remember seeing the picture on the left right after it was taken and being embarrassed (see bottom of post). That “skinny minnie” look everyone always said they were so jealous of was NOT how I wanted to look. Not even a little bit… but I didn’t know anything else was possible.

After many years of rapidly losing weight, never feeling good, more doctors appointments than I can count, passing out several times in public because my body shut down, and more hospital stays than I cared to have in a lifetime, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Continue reading “Always Sick…”

Drowning

Drowning

Big Fat Confession Time: I’ve been drowning.

These past 10 days, I have felt like I’ve been fighting to keep my head above water.

It’s like no matter what I plan or do, my head just has NOT been in the game, at all. Maybe for a few hours of the day but not my normal, “balls to the walls, crank out more work in 8 hours than most people do in a week” sort of way.

Which bothers the fuck out of me. It makes me feel like a fraud. It makes me feel like I’m failing. But when I stop and look at the 30,000 foot view, I’m still killing it.

Let me explain; Continue reading “Drowning”

Sundays

Sundays

Sunday mornings have always been special to me. The vibe is different. It’s always fun and calm and effortless.

This morning I was walking around the house doing random tasks. Putting dishes away, switching around laundry, making coffee, aimlessly walking around out in the yard with the dogs, lighting candles in the living room, all kinds of calm, effortless things that make me smile. Continue reading “Sundays”

Are You Missing Something Simply Because You’re Not Looking?

Are You Missing Something Simply Because You’re Not Looking?

When I say I am creating the life of my dreams, I mean it. But that doesn’t mean I always have a crystal clear view of what it all looks like in detail.

I have an outline, a guideline, an idea…but more importantly a FEELING. I know how I want to feel in my business, in my life, in my love. I know what I won’t settle for. I know what I want. I know what I’m willing to compromise on and what I’m not.

And I know that I CAN and WILL have it.

I remember the first time Tony told me he was just waiting for me to meet people I fit with from my space and move somewhere else.
Continue reading “Are You Missing Something Simply Because You’re Not Looking?”

Is Keeping Your Mouth Shut Inauthentic?

Is Keeping Your Mouth Shut Inauthentic?

Real talk, lately I’ve been super frustrated in a couple of areas of life. I’ve been put in a few situations where I was told, or told myself, that I needed to just back off and not say anything.

I was left to stand here feeling like I was choking, feet stuck in the concrete. Like legit, uncomfortable as fuck from not saying what was on my mind or for not opening up the conversation… No matter how tough that conversation may or may not have been if I had.
Continue reading “Is Keeping Your Mouth Shut Inauthentic?”